His story begins in Mozambique, where one day he decided to fuck a coconut as a way of diversifying his masturbation routine. This only gets worse from here. He writes:. I end up grabbing the coconut drill and through 20ish minutes of concerted effort end up creating a hole large enough for me to stick my porker into. I decide it requires some lube and grab the nearest slippery thing some butter before shoving it into the coconut followed shortly by my meat. I fuck the coconut and it actually feels pretty damn good so I blow my load, shove the coconut under my bed and continue about my day. Despite his deduction that it emanated from the come-filled coconut, he decided it was still good for one last fap. You see, the reason for the increased number of flies was that the coconut was evidently, in hindsight, a nearly perfect place to lay eggs. As I penetrate the coconut one last time I begin to feel a strange wriggling sensation.
R29 Original Series
Anyway, around 8 years back I lived in Northern Mozambique, a coastal southern African country with quite a warm climate. My mother at the time was going through a 'health nut' phase and only buying foods she deemed healthy enough. One of these was coconuts. She would buy several coconuts a week to use in food from the local market. One day I hear that my mother is going to be out for pretty much the entire afternoon. Horny me decides that it would be a fantastic idea to fuck a coconut. Honestly to this day I can't fathom why I thought that would be a good idea but my train of thought back then was clearly somewhat clogged. I decide it requires some lube and grab the nearest slippery thing some butter before shoving it into the coconut followed shortly by my meat. I fuck the coconut and it actually feels pretty damn good so I blow my load, shove the coconut under my bed and continue about my day. For the next week the coconut is my saviour.
Even more FMLs
It should be perfectly clear that you are not supposed to put your dick into a coconut, but there's just no stopping some people. Those are the kind of people who will go ahead and put their dick in a coconut even if you explicitly tell them what a terrible idea it is. This is where people come to share stories of some calamity that users have gotten themselves into. He said that while he was living in Mozambique, his mother was going through a "health nut" phase, meaning that there was a lot of fruit in the house, including coconuts. One day I hear that my mother is going to be out for pretty much the entire afternoon. The man then details how he drilled a hole big enough to insert his penis into the coconut, and had sex with it after lubing himself up with some butter, obviously. Whenever I want to get off I simply take it out and fuck it in its delightfully tight hole made better each time by accumulating volumes of my semen and butter acting as a lubricant. It's heaven. Jesus Christ.
One of these was coconuts. She would buy several coconuts a week to use in food from the local market. Being a horny young man, coconutthrowaway69 decided that these coconuts would not be for eating. He drilled a large hole in the coconut, added some butter for lube , and shoved his penis in the coconut. Now, while this story has been horrifying from the get-go, this is where it gets worse. This is where it gets horribly, horribly wrong. He then, naturally, threw the coconut across the room in horror and had to clean up the maggoty, semeny, coconutty mess from his floor.